More Marathon: Numbers & Photos

One week ago I ran a marathon. Over the course of the week, I received my official results (including photos) and thought I'd briefly share - in the spirit of this blog: partly because I'm proud and partly to make fun of myself.

so here's my official result: 

Not bad. If I was 1:55:03 on the front, that means I was 1:59:25 on the back. Pretty much that entire slowdown came in the last 6 miles - the last quarter of the race. Makes sense, I guess. (photo evidence of this later).

In 2012 I ran a half marathon, with the expressed goal of finishing in under 2 hours, and failed. Miserably. It's apples & oranges as far as my level of preparation, but considering the improvement, I still feel alright about a sub-2 hour second half. 

Apparently, they also offer a "visual" results page, which is sort of nice if it's hard for you to imagine numbers... or what a runner's shadow might look like:

you can tell this is inaccurate, because the runner has both feet off the ground at the same time

My favorite part of this is in the lower right corner: Over the second half of my marathon I past almost 400 people, and was only passed by 63. Yeesh. "hey, you know how you faded down the stretch, well apparently some other suckers really faded." Thanks, Houston.

Also, just in case I caught myself feeling good, here's a nice little map of where I was when the winner crossed the finish line.

why would you show me this?

Yep, looks like about halfway. Awesome. Thanks for that. 

Also, that's not fair - that guy only ran for like 2 hours. That's not even that tough. I ran for like 4 hours... so my accomplishment is much more impressive. It's simple math, really.

Speaking of easy - here's a race photo of me early on in the race:

hey - this isn't bad. this is gonna be fun! (you poor ignorant fool)

I actually ran the entire way across that blue mat with my arms held high like a moron, and then was laughing at myself afterward thinking about how stupid that picture will look. But the picture (amazingly) looks even more stupid, because it's of me laughing at myself while running a marathon. This is like mile 8 I think. I'm basically still in the "warm up" phase.

I'm omitting the next photo (around mile 15) because I'm concerned the wedgie will be deemed "obscene". No one needs to see that. Suffice it to say that things do not get prettier as a marathon progresses.

To wit, 

Am I more upset about the pain in my legs or that some doofus is trying to steal my orange-shirt-notoriety? 

This is in the home stretch - I think somewhere in the last mile. I'm wearing my "just finish" face. I can't feel my legs... despite following the low-impact strategy of keeping both feet on the ground (a difficult task while "running"). How much longer? 

The two pictures back-to-back are pretty funny. Caption possibilities abound. I think most would reduce down to some version of "marathons break people".

I finally finished...

I was going to raise my hands in triumph, but this is as high as they'd go

A couple things here: the first thing I notice is the the photographer is struggling to balance the light. If you're subject is in the shadows, expose for the shadows, buddy. Second, I was going to raise my arms in triumph, but they never got all the way up. Instead, I'm sort of throwing my hands up as if to ask "why? why did I do this?"

I start feeling better once I actually stop running.

I did it! #ubiquitousthumbsup 

After I'm corralled into the expo center and still not given water, I'm a bit more bewildered.

yeah, sure I'll take a picture... does that mean I get water sooner? I just want one...

I'm sporting a pretty classic "Wait - what's going on? What have I done?" smile. Sort of like when the hidden camera guy tells Chris Farley he's drinking Columbian Decaffeinated Coffee Crystals... "w-w-what?"

Anyway, despite the pain and delirium, I'm glad I did it. I'll be working on improving that split time this spring and using it as another reason to fight the fat.